Friday, December 30, 2011

Tête-à-têtes In The Microbe World

"Ah !Proteus! Did a truck full of them pass by ? Living by the sea shores I tell you, comes with all this..." -a colleague remarks after a whiff of air brings the smell of fish. By the way Proteus are bacteria whose colonies on culture plates smell like those. Apparently a Sea- God in Greek mythology shares the name, interesting huh!

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* "Oh ain't buying it, its too Gram negative"- me on seeing a PINK dress in a store. And this is what Gram negative bacilli exactly look like:-)


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* " You either turn sensitive, or be resistant...do not play safe in the intermediate zone" - my advice to a friend, while he deals a difficult issue. Only if life's problems were solved with something like the Kirby Bauer Method  we use to test for antibiotic sensitivity of microbes.




* "Eeeks ! Looks like the Lactobacillus have been overactive!"- me again, while eating curds. Yes, they are exactly the ones who turns milk into curds. We have overly friendly microbes as well;-)

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Last but not the least, the most satisfying of all...

" Keep the phone, let me go take a bath. I am back from the  field. Ticks you see, they have to be removed within twenty hours !"- a friend of mine from and of the forests bommerangs my words.

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Life like a microbiologist sees it, a life like the microbes make it :-)

-R.

Thursday, December 29, 2011

Thursday Challenge #7- Light



"Deepamjyothi parabrahma
Deepamjyothi janardhana
Deepo me hara tu paapam
Deepaa jyothir namostute"


Monday, December 26, 2011

A Strange Place



I walked past him, unfettered and unbothered. A few steps ahead and it struck to me” What if it was me or someone who I know on the road tomorrow like that?” A chill ran down. I turned and looked at him from a distance. I was scared to get near him for obvious reasons. He seemed to be in his twenties, too young to die but not too impossible, well if alcohol flowed instead of blood in his arteries past last night. His limbs lay in a solid freeze, was he dead or was I just imagining too much?

To an imagining mind, imaginations once set shall have no boundaries. On the distressing side of it, I thought what if he was lying there after a heat stroke or a heart attack or someone hit him or he was sleeping after a tiring day at work, normal as that. All possibilities occurred to me and it stopped there, as human as the feeling could get.

I did not think more than this much, and walked away like those thousands of strangers who had seen him throughout the day and yet ignored him. I know not what became of him after that. Not my concern maybe, not yours, not anyone’s, or is it?

What does it take to cross that line of hesitancy to help someone who we do not know, or should we? The fear seems bigger than any purpose or conscience. Does this count up over there, well for that matter even while we live in this world? Bet this, it is a strange place full of strangers, almost always. Contradictions are welcomed. I know not of my fate if I were there instead of him, it frightens me.SERIOUSLY.

-R.

Clippy Mood


Bring the people of this world in a line right now and this is how you shall find all of us. Interesting right, how different people in different places go through different things at different times and still connect. That is the way everything falls in place and makes sense, lest we fail to understand.

I bought these cute paper clips today, a Christmas gift to myself :-) The emotive side of me feel in love with them at first sight. This is exactly what my face goes through, well everything in one day. The fourth from right is so me!:-D Which one are you?

-R.


Saturday, December 24, 2011

A Not So Merry Weather

If you were to live in a town where you cannot help but observe lush green coconut trees swaying in bright sunshine to the tunes of winds from the sea all throughout the year like I am doing right now, I bet you shall forget what winter or Christmas eve is like.And no holiday to top that, can it get more dreary ? 

Every place on this earth has its fair share of seasons, this place does without winter.I am learning to do without it too. Of course I miss those steaming hot coffees in the foggy mornings, the warm and fuzzy sweaters, the urge to snuggle under the thickest of rugs at home. God answered my prayers when I moaned back then maybe. Strange isn't it ? The way prayers work, when you want something you do not have it and when you have something you do not want it :-)

On a merrier note, MERRY CHRISTMAS to you all:-)

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PS: Santa if you are not on a holiday like this and are listening tonight, heaven sake get me some winter!

-R.

Saturday, December 17, 2011

Lines For Life

Some books are close to my heart, and some lines closer. They have changed the way I look at my life and my people. Some have made me smile, some have made me cry and most importantly all of them have made me feel. I sleep and wake up with them. Here are a few of them. Let me know if any of them touch you too. In no particular order:

" For you a thousand times over"
 Hassan in Khlaed Hosseini's 'The Kite Runner'

"I keep myself busy. Time goes faster that way"
Clare in Audrey Niffenegger's 'Time Traveler's Wife'


"It takes a great deal of bravery to stand up to our enemies, but just as much to stand up to our friends"
Albus Dumbledore in JK Rowling's 'Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone'


“Love simply is.” 
Athena in Paulo Coelho's The Witch of Portobello



“Someone who thinks death is the scariest thing doesn't know a thing about life” 
Lily in Sue Monk Kidd's 'The Secret Life of Bees'


“Every life has one true love snapshot” 
Mitch Albom in his 'The Five People You Meet in Heaven'


Do share your favorites:-)


Monday, December 12, 2011

Chicken Out

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If you happen to be a vegetarian, living and especially eating in a town where food is equivalent to meat comes with grave aftermaths. I am in Mangalore, and I am a vegetarian.Nothing like this mismatch.Here is my story.These days brunch in the college canteen is my only calorie intake for the day. Today surprisingly or not so surprisingly I ended up with the wrong thing on my plate, chicken! I realized it with the first pierce of a fork, the texture and colour seemed pretty weird and very fortunately it did not reach my taste buds.What followed was a hell of a scene, quite naturally. I swore silently to myself never to enter the place again.

Few of you may ask me what is so criminal about what had happened.Well nothing! I have nothing against KFC and places alike, their chicken wings and legs or people who devour them. It is more to do with the choice of what we want to eat. Many in the world aren't blessed with this. If somebody does not respect that, and calls incidents like these as accidents, bless them with the famines of Somalia.

“If more of us valued food and cheer above hoarded gold, it would be a much merrier world.” 

-JRR Tolkien-

-R.

Fathers And Lessons


Life's unsolicited but logical lessons, most of them come from my father. And over a period of time I have realized that it gives him a immense fatherly satisfaction if I nod my head and say "Yes, Appa"  even if he is on the difficult side for whatever reasons. Call it concern, responsibility or plain possessiveness, he believes he thinks the best. Men in general are funny, fathers funnier and mine the funniest!

"Any man can be a father.It takes someone special to be a dad."

-Anonymus-
-R.

Saturday, December 10, 2011

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Running Race


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If you fear that you are running alone
While your every step meets a stone
Look behind, ahead and around
This world is on a loose ground
In an not so ordinary search
Not any little, but too much
For some silence in a solace
For some peace in the race
Of life, on the road to dust
Thinking running is a must
Don’t you wish you stay
To walk your own way?

-R-

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

The Kolaveri Question

Why this kolaveri di ???
The best part of the song well according to me is "only english":-) Aaa....Di....while most of  us are in sync with Dhanush and his song, I happened to ask one gobbledygook question to a friend of mine today "Can your anger 'kill' someone?" and this is what I got to hear" Play Angry Birds, you will know":-)

Insaneness is a weird pleasure, sometimes for more than the moment it lasts. Anger is undeniably one among the many of mine, the repercussions are unbloggable. Under the pressure of this song, let me ask the same thing to you all. Do let me know:-)

Good night
-R.


Sunday, November 20, 2011

Good Heavens!


You know when a book has befriended you for life? You reach the last page, last line and the last word and realize that you have traveled a beautiful journey all along. You feel like reading or beginning something like it all over again. I am not talking about good books. This is about the ones which leave you thinking; this is about those which leave you feeling.

More often than not, this happens to me with every other book I read :-) But this time I am completely out of earth, literally. A level higher in fact. It has been a week now since I read 'the five people you meet in Heaven', the book is back in my shelf and every time I look at it sitting there quietly I get ‘This-happened-right-in-front-of-my-eyes!’ kind of flashbacks. Some crazy thought process occurs in my mind which says the protagonist’s life is a part of mine. That’s the magic about these kind of books, simple yet ethereal.

Well, feels strange thinking of the five people I will meet in heaven if at all I happen to reach there. Wonder who they would be? What will heaven be like? What really happens when we die? How do we know, should we? This book made me believe that death for reasons many is as wondrous as life. What say?

Calvin knows about heaven better;-)


Monday, November 14, 2011

Live Your Time



“I wish I had a little more than twenty four hours a day”, we say and hear this every now and then. Don’t we? Humans by nature are hankers. We wish for a lot of things, amongst them the most desired is time. If we had it more, if at all! Some of us may think of hobbies, some of us may think of trips and treks, some of us may think of being with family and friends, some of us may think of helping others, some of us may think of taking a break just like that, some of us may even think of work! Reading through the many posts at Indiblogger, I realized something very doubtlessly true. There is so much that everyone wants to do, in the so little time we all crave for. I could not help but smile, because there are many of you like me out there. Thank you all for making me feel that I am not alone ;-)

But let us stop awhile and think, what new good is to be done or old bad is to be undone if we had some more hours in a day? If you were to ask me, that which cannot be done in the twenty four hours in hand is highly unlikely to be done in the next twenty four hours too, leave alone those extra hours whoever shall gift us is what I would say. What we all wish to do in the time we do not have but wish to have is something which can be done in the time we already have. It is not the lack of time, but the lack of something else, and that ‘else’ is what we all have trouble figuring out. It takes time, and sometimes all life.

So when I put on my thinking cap, I had a long list of things which I want to do in those two extra hours if I were blessed with everyday. I would read more, I would write more, I would talk more, I would paint more, I would work more, I would play more, I would learn more, I would smile more, I would laugh more, I would love more and I would live more. Those two hours shall be as beautiful as I want the rest twenty four to be. As extraordinary as my routine can get :-)

Over a period of time, I have come to believe that we all have varied opinions and values about time. If I were a child like before I would have wanted to play on the swing or build a sand castle on the beach or climb a mango tree, and now that I am what I am now I  want to do all that I wish to like what I have already told you, and if I were in my gray haired days, trust me its going to be completely different! Something which I know that I do not know right now. With time ‘everything’ changes, even our wishes. Do what you want to and are destined to, just let it pass. No plan is fool proof, no life is exemplary. We are here to live our hours, not to count them. Take my word, take your time and most importantly live it :-)

PS: This post is written as a part of  Surf Excel Matic #GetSmart Contest at Indiblogger, in the process of figuring out an answer to their question "If you had two extra hours in a day, how would you spend it?". Thank you for making me realize the value of each moment of my twenty four ;-)

-R.

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Ripples In The Sea



Ripples in the sea, fading ripples in the sea
Yeah, we all are! He, she, they, you and me
Substance, sight or spirits within just a wee
When we part in pain or get together in glee
A tempest wave, wish we wish we like to be
To storm the still waters in a fleeting spree
To kiss the sandy shore, to rise and fall free
But where we exist not, we stay only to flee
And call it life, live it, you may or will agree
Ripples in the sea, fading ripples in the sea
Yeah, we all are! He, she, they, you and me

-R-

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Milestone


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Today is the usual, but a little momentous. It’s my twenty fifth birthday. Of late I have started thinking that these kinds of days are just an another milestone on the way, an obvious thought which is a part of growing up. It does feel special, more so the right time to sit back and surmise why, how and where I am heading towards. I wish I knew it all.

I was speaking of goals with a dear friend of mine last evening until he decided that I am irritated, and we had to end the conversation. A goal is a critical thing. Especially if one wants to live, not just survive. My suggestion if you are on similar boats, keep your goal(s) permanently interesting. Something which pushes you to do better , makes you feel that you are a step closer to it each day. Take your time. Remember all goals are not measurable or explainable, at the end of the day it is only you.

On the contrary, there are these easy moments when I feel what is the point if I know what my goal is or anything else, let me not bother about it and move with the flow. This does come with consequences, good or bad or maybe even neutral. But is it so very criminal not to know or regard something so very important and be on the other side of life? The ideal thing we all know is to keep a balance, all of us are striving in this direction in one way or the other right? Uncertainty is what which drives us, though we have two options, we fail or we succeed.To see what we want to see, to do what we want to do and to be what we want to be is what life is all about.

I am not going to hop on either side of the fence today. No quarter life crisis, no quarter life hoopla. This birthday of mine has no resolution, no regret, no pondering, no whining, no need, no want, no thank you note and no wish list. It is about me being where I am, how I am and what I am. As simple as that.


Woody Allen has a very interesting take on life, many of you would agree like I do. Read what he has to say:

“In my next life I want to live my life backwards. You start out dead and get that out of the way. Then you wake up in an old people's home feeling better every day. You get kicked out for being too healthy, go collect your pension, and then when you start work, you get a gold watch and a party on your first day. You work for 40 years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You party, drink alcohol, and are generally promiscuous, then you are ready for high school. You then go to primary school, you become a kid, you play. You have no responsibilities, you become a baby until you are born. And then you spend your last 9 months floating in luxurious spa-like conditions with central heating and room service on tap, larger quarters every day and then Voila! You finish off as an orgasm!” 
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PS: Another milestone on this blog, this is my 200th post here. For reasons many, the feeling is very out of the world:-)

Saturday, November 5, 2011

Thursday, November 3, 2011

November Rains



November rains, there is something mystic and intriguing about them.  This is an unusual transition of weather. The showers are bringing all coldness and weariness of the world to my town. For reasons such and else the coming winter seems to be quite melancholic.

The view outside the window is picturesque, this is how it looks these days. Bland yet beautiful. The rain drops are like a translucent curtain clouding the landscape. Every so often I feel like wiping the fog off and seeing what is outside, at times I just let it be and watch the drops slide down in a line racing against each other slowly. Either ways it feels like the bliss of solitude.

Unexpectedness is uncomfortable, but it is something which can carry us forward if we take it with ease. Sometimes we just have to wait, do a lot of things or a little thing or maybe even nothing. The things which we deserve will surely reach us. Clouds may fill our skies, rain drops may fall on our windowpanes. We just have stand and watch.The rains and winters shall pass because sunshine is always on its way.

AN IRISH BLESSING FOR YOU

May you always have work for your hands to do.

May your pockets hold always a coin or two.

May the sun shine bright on your windowpane.

May the rainbow be certain to follow each rain.

May the hand of a friend always be near you.

And may God fill your heart with gladness to cheer you.

-R.


Tuesday, October 25, 2011

That's All We Know

Internet does keep most of us in a hopeful mood. If we want to know about something we know what to do right, "Google it!" is what we advise each other in such circumstances. I often grumble "Why can't you just tell me!!!'' when I hear something like that from my friends, but I do agree it is the best and the easiest choice we have. Surprisingly this is what I was greeted with on my laptop screen a few days ago.

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This was more like a Catch-44! The immediate question in my mind was what next, rather where next. Glitches apart, isn’t this robot or whatever it looks like impressively innovative. Look at the falling nuts and bolts, the helplessness depicted is absolutely hilarious yet technical.

What made me think was the last line highlighted in grey “That’s all we know”, now imagine something or someone on whom you are entirely dependent on telling you this when you need them the most! The problem at times is that we are never prepared for the unexpected and that is what makes us vulnerable to whatever little difficulty life throws at us. We panic, lose our cool and give up. The best of our things may go kaput, the best of our ideas may not work or the best of our friends may throw their hands up. It can happen, there are possibilities.

What can happen how, where and why we really do not know, because “That’s all we know” We are indeed very little and imperfect when we think of our power in this world. All we can do is what Google suggested me here” Please try again…” Well for me it did work after 30 seconds;-) My suggestion when you face something like this, remember what Sue Monk Kidd says in her book ‘The Secret Life of Bees’-


"There is nothing perfect...only life."

-R.

Sunday, October 23, 2011

A Perfect Fairy Tale


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Dad: He took her hand, and he kissed it. Then he swooped her up onto his horse. And the beautiful princess and the handsome prince rode off to his castle...where they lived happily ever after...
Sam: Do fairy tales come true, Dad?.
Dad: Well, no. But dreams come true.
Sam: Do you have a dream?
Dad: Yeah. My dream is that you'II grow up and go to college and then maybe someday you'II build your own castle.
Sam: Where do princesses go to college?
Dad: They go...where the princes go. They go to Princeton.But, Sam, you know, fairy tales aren't just about finding handsome princes.They're about fulfilling your dreams...and about standing up for what you believe in. As I always say, never let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game.
If you have watched the movie 'A Cinderella Story', this father daughter conversation in one of the first few scenes may seem familiar. When I watched it I could not help but smile because this is what precisely I have been hearing from my Dad all through my life. Some fathers are typical, aren't they? They want their daughter not to be any prince's princess but they want them to be their own queen, strong and independent. Nothing else makes them proud.
Very long ago when I was in class three I had played the role of Cinderella in a drama during the annual school day function. The flowing cloud blue dress and the dark blue tiptoeing shoes are etched in my memory forever. The movie stirred those good and naive times of childhood. What I remember even more is the excitement with which Dad and Mom were running around the whole town for a week or so in a search for the perfect attire. And when I was on the stage wearing what they had brought me their happiness knew no bounds.Isn't it wonderful, the smile on the face of someone to whom you mean the world, especially when you are the reason behind it?
Fulfilling your dreams and standing for what you believe in is worth more than any crown which can make you a princess is what I have always been told, just like Sam. If you know what you want to be and where you want your life to go there is nothing like it, now that is exactly what I call a perfect fairy tale. I believe in it, do you?:-)

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Angry Bulls


Expecting life to treat you well because you’re a good person is like expecting an angry bull not to charge because you’re a vegetarian.


Even if a herd is behind,stay good:-)

Good night

-R.

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

On The Other Side

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I have always had this secret wish to teach at least once in my life, exactly like my teachers in school. These days it is more than coming true. Everything comes tagged with a clause right, and therefore today I was with a bunch of not so nervous but test giving students, I was invigilating them for an hour or so. Very mundane and tiring task, now I get what it takes to be teacher.

Being on the other side in an examination hall and having nothing really worth to do, it is fun to watch the plethora of expressions on the face of someone who is trying to figure out what to write. While some stare at the walls and ceiling, some bite their pen like it is the only food for thought and some refuse to lift their head up because they are really busy scribbling an epic tale. Watching them I had this ‘been there done that’ feeling and I realized that I belong to the third category. I could not help but smile.

Every teacher can write a book titled ‘Funny Answers By Students’, this one is an entry to mine:


This was supposed to be a short note for five marks, and whoever wrote this answer took the meaning of ‘short’ in the most literal sense I guess. This is all he had to say. Whatever this student has written is definitely right. Our answers to all those questions of life...I wish they were this simple, sigh.

Have any test episodes and experiences to share? You are in the right place:-)

-R.

Monday, October 10, 2011

Live Or Flutter By


 The forests are not perennially green but yet our dear dame Vanessa, a butter yellow butterfly roams every nook and corner, every creek and crevice to meet every bush and plant everyday. She greets and thanks them all for everything that they give her while she needs them the most. The periwinkles are her favorites. She makes sure that she hugs them tight with her wings at least once during her visits. She loves her wings although they are not really bright and bother her now or then. But one day it was different. “Dear Vanessa why do you just flutter by?” asked one of the periwinkles out of concern, her critics that they are. This made her think. Things were different from then on. She flew back thinking of an answer. She had to come up with one. And now she is sitting on a rusty window sill looking at the rain on the other side of the glass, pondering over the purpose of her life. She is hoping to know.Can you help Vanessa, why do you think she is in this world ? Why do you think you are in this world?


"We are like butterflies who flutter for a day and think it is forever."

-Carl Sagan-

We all have these Vanessa moments now and then. Everyone wants to be something different but at the end of the day what each one of us gets back home with is a deserved share of pain and happiness, nothing else. If everyone and everything is unique in this world, why do not we show or appreciate it enough ? What binds us to the sameness we live in? Thank God, Vanessa has her periwinkles to make her realize and save her. Not everyone has. You or me may not have, you or me may not need. You or me may not be Vanessa at all. But remember what this little flying fairy has to say " Look at me, my wings are the worth of all joys and my days are the length of all life in this world".Understanding this she flies back to the forests again.This time to hug the cherry blossoms, daisies, lilies, leaves, mosses and weeds along with the periwinkles. Vanessa has found her purpose, have you?

You are special...feel that you are...show that you are:-)

-R.

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Ding Enough


Ah well he did put. To do what you say you want to do is a feat by itself, an ode to this man for that. Not many of us own a life that can inspire another few. Steve Jobs, mostly known for his exceptional contributions which have changed the world and more so for this Commencement Address at Stanford in 2005 has left us with a firm belief that Apple is more than a fruit.

The part of his speech which has dinged my mind and always stayed with me is this:

"No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don't want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life's change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true.
Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary"

The life and words of Steve Jobs have taught me:


  • Where you come from is not what that matters, it is where you go that does
  • Be open to learning new things because you never know what, when and how anything can come to use
  • Work is a large part of our lives, DO NOT settle. If you do not like it do not do it. Love what you do
  • Look into the mirror, question yourself, find your own answers
  • Look backwards, connect your past to your future
  • Accept success, embrace failure
  • Most importantly live your dream, inspire the others to dream about your living.


Greatness is not in being famous, it is in making a positive difference in the lives of the people who matter and who do not as well. Most of us shall leave this world with memories for our kith and kin, but this man has left us with a life full of ideas and inspiration.Ding enough. 

R.I.P.

-R. 

The Sunrise



The world is cloaked in darkness when I wake up in the mornings. The curtains draping the windows of my room seem like giant stage screens before an opera begins, I pull them everyday because I always wish for something new out there. The winds from the sea which smell of salt have quietened themselves. The crickets who have hummed throughout the night are mellowing down. I look at the book which kept me busy before I fell asleep. It is lying open next to the pillow on the page I was reading, the story had paused. It is then when I notice that everything has.

What is the point in getting up from bed if you are too tired doing the same dreary thing again and if you do not know what else to do with the next twenty four hours that you have? What if you have had enough or are hungry for more? Being busy is sometimes enough to make you feel dull and dead. Believe me it is possible. Sometimes a pause or a change is the need of the moment. Well, what it shall be and how it shall come is the question. The answer to which not many  of us can predict or know. That is what life is all about. Maybe that is why we believe in hope, and we wait for the sunrise. I daily do.

-R.

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Specialization

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A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.

-Robert Heinlein-

Agree? I am a fanatic when it comes to lengthy quotes, more so when they make the most sense.Sharing this one with you here:-) Specialization is not every human's forte, but when we do something we should be giving it our best. Every activity that we want to do is worth a try, every effort is worth a result. There is no room for inertia if we are on the move. Stand saying "Oh some other time!" and watch the jumbos tramp over you, you see specialization is really for the insects;-)

Good Sunday
-R.

Friday, September 30, 2011

The Bugle


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I woke up from a sleep not so mine
To look around to see if all was fine
Mad crickets in great unison sang
Bats came flying together to hang
Witching hours frightened me more
Or was there someone at the door?
Were those lights two eyes of glare
Who was that walking down the stair?
Did a whisk past the curtains move
Or any of my nightmares come true?
While I cursed and said O’ my spite
I found you asleep holding me tight
In a snore so guileless and glorious
My only fear that made me furious
And yet I laid next to you astound
For when you are beside or around
O’ sound for life, my bugle dearest
No devil or demon dare get nearest...

-R-

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

The Singing Bird



I came across a video on Youtube now, I am sharing it here. Wonder what makes it sound like the best music I have ever heard. All I want to do now is stroll alone in the woods with a reed in my hand stamping every puddle,crossing every brook and hearing every bird possible. Watch it in mute for the first time and then with the audio.Let me know the difference if you feel any. This is what it made me think:

-R.

Sunday, September 25, 2011

Cock A Doodle Doo


”Why did the chicken cross the road?” so asked a mademoiselle trying hard to get humorous while she was nibbling a leg like there is no tomorrow. Some people are never done with chicken, food or joke in either way. To balance them there are some devoted vegans who cannot bear both. My reply to her was quite impulsive actually” To get to your plate my dear, sad that it met with an accident in the process, perfect oral autopsy by the way!” is all what I said. Little did she know that I belong to the latter category, the sulk on her face was for the records.

There is no end to the list of ignored and unanswered questions in this world. We humans are in an eternal quest of knowing how, what, who, where, when and why. Have you noticed this, we have this tendency of using humour as one of our last resorts when the answers to our questions are beyond our capacities of comprehension. Chicken like every animal and bird else has unfortunately been our victim;-)'Just joke away, eat it anyway' is what we believe.

Picture Courtesy

Yes, I seriously do! If there is one question about the chicken for which I would like to know the answer, it is this- What about the chicken makes it ‘finger lickin' good’, is the murder worth the eat?” Do let me know if you know, well I am just being curious;-) Meanwhile read Chicken Philosophy, this is what the great men had to say in answer to this thought provoking question:

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD???

Plato:  For the greater good.

Aristotle:  To fulfill its nature on the other side.

Karl Marx:  It was a historical inevitability.

Machiavelli:  So that its subjects will view it with admiration, as a
chicken which has the daring and courage to boldly cross the road,
but also with fear, for whom among them has the strength to contend
with such a paragon of avian virtue?  In such a manner is the princely
chicken's dominion maintained.

Hippocrates:  Because of an excess of light pink gooey stuff in its
pancreas.

Jacques Derrida: Any number of contending discourses may be discovered
within the act of the chicken crossing the road, and each
interpretation is equally valid as the authorial intent can never be
discerned, because structuralism is DEAD, DAMMIT, DEAD!

Thomas de Torquemada:  Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll
find out.

Timothy Leary:  Because that's the only kind of trip the Establishment
would let it take.

Douglas Adams:  Forty-two.

Nietzsche:  Because if you gaze too long across the Road, the Road
gazes also across you.

Oliver North:  National Security was at stake.

B.F. Skinner:  Because the external influences which had pervaded its
sensorium from birth had caused it to develop in such a fashion that
it would tend to cross roads, even while believing these actions to be
of its own free will.

Carl Jung:  The confluence of events in the cultural gestalt
necessitated that individual chickens cross roads at this historical
juncture, and therefore synchronicitously brought such occurrences
into being.

Jean-Paul Sartre:  In order to act in good faith and be true to
itself, the chicken found it necessary to cross the road.

Ludwig Wittgenstein:  The possibility of "crossing" was encoded into
the objects "chicken" and "road", and circumstances came into being
which
caused the actualization of this potential occurrence.

Albert Einstein:  Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road
crossed the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.

Aristotle:  To actualize its potential.

Buddha:  If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken-nature.

Howard Cosell:  It may very well have been one of the most astonishing
events to grace the annals of history.  An historic, unprecedented
avian biped with the temerity to attempt such an herculean achievement
formerly relegated to homo sapien pedestrians is truly a remarkable
occurence.

Salvador Dali:  The Fish.

Darwin:  It was the logical next step after coming down from the
trees.

Emily Dickinson:  Because it could not stop for death.

Epicurus:  For fun.

Ralph Waldo Emerson: It didn't cross the road; it transcended it.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe:  The eternal hen-principle made it do it.

Ernest Hemingway:  To die.  In the rain.

Werner Heisenberg:  We are not sure which side of the road the chicken
was on, but it was moving very fast.

David Hume:  Out of custom and habit.

Saddam Hussein:  This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were
quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

Jack Nicholson:  'Cause it (censored) wanted to.  That's the
(censored) reason.

Pyrrho the Skeptic: What road?

Ronald Reagan:  Well,...................

John Sununu:  The Air Force was only too happy to provide the
transportation, so quite understandably the chicken availed himself
of the opportunity.

The Sphinx:  You tell me.

Henry David Thoreau:  To live deliberately ... and suck all the marrow
out of life.

Mark Twain:  The news of its crossing has been greatly exaggerated.

Mishima:   For the beauty of it. The chicken's extension of its
sinuous legs sent shivers of a dark despair into the souls not only of
the silently watching hens but also the roosters, who felt a sudden
sexual desire for their exquisite comrade.  The dark courage of the
chicken was as beautiful as drops of dew upon jade at midnight, struck
by a partial moon, its light filtered through clouds. One of the
deeply aroused roosters could stand the intensity of the moment no
more and bit off the head of the beautiful, courageous chicken-hero,
whose wine blood was deliciously drunken by the road, and he died.

Johnny Cochran:  The chicken didn't cross the road. Some
chicken-hating, genocidal, lying public official moved the road right
under the chicken's feet while he was practicing his golf swing and
thinking about his family.

Camus:  The chicken's mother had just died.  But this did not really
upset him, as any number of witnesses can attest.  In fact, he
crossed just because the sun got in his eyes.

John Sununu (again):  I would argue that the chicken never crossed the
road at all.  That it is a story concocted by the Clinton
Administration to distract attention from their failed agriculture
policy. Where is the evidence that the chicken crossed the road?
Where, Michael?

Michael Kinsley:  Oh, John, come on!  Everybody knows the chicken
crossed the road.  What evidence do you need?  It's obvious that the
chicken crossed the road.  Your whole argument is just a smoke and
mirror tactic to distract us from the fact that most chickens polled
now back the Democratic Party.  You ought to be ashamed of yourself,
John.

Siskel:  I don't know why it crossed the road, but I loved it.  Thumbs
up!

Ebert:  I disagree.  The whole thing left the audience wondering; the
chicken's crossing the road was never clearly explained and the
chicken didn't emote very well.  It couldn't even speak English!
Thumbs down.

Michael Kinsley:  But you both agree it did cross the road, right?
See, John.  I'm right as usual.


Disclaimer: This post was written out of an inquisitiveness to know what makes one's flesh the other's food.The intentions are to make the carnivores think, not to hurt. Do think and let the world know you are opinion if you are one.

Good day
-R.